Vinushka

Typical... a morning starting off as it would always for a trip. The desire to not wake up and then the realization slowly seeping in that as long as I rolled out of bed at that god forsaken hour, I would be on my way to Denver to see Dir en grey... for the third time in a month. A feeling like nothing else, knowing that for once, I was that person: the one who got to be lucky enough to go to more than one show. Jitters, a plunge of nerves in my stomach and that sick feeling of just before finals looming under the skin. But that didn't matter, it never does. It'll all pass when it matters and free me of its binds in just enough time to enjoy what I'm leaving my hometown to experience.

The morning was cold, my breath hanging frozen in the air as I stepped outside, reminding my husband to eat the last piece of strawberry fudge cake before it went bad. A farewell and a smile, a gentle kiss and a hug filled with bids of a good time and a safe trip. "Drive well," he says and I only nod. I always do.

We leave town a little later than expected, but nothing major, nothing that will put us behind schedule. I planned for this, too. Always a good idea. The trip to Denver was the usual, a car filled with a bubbling and then tired crew, two of which didn't sleep the night prior. But everything went smoothly, the drive seeming shorter than usual, though actually longer than the time prior. As expected, the trip to Dallas only a few days prior made it all seem shorter than it truly was. Perspective, just as anything else in life. But then, also a foreshadowing of events to come. Some things too fast, others too slow... and everything settling into perspective.

Our hotel turned out to be nothing short of amazing. An actual suite rather than just a room. Beautiful and elegant, just the right size for the batch who'd be staying in it. Pleasant. Two nights came out to a little over a hundred dollars with my husband's discount, so we have only him to thank for such amazing accommodations. Only a little bit later, we headed out to get Ashley from the airport. I had been maybe a little bit apprehensive that we'd not get along for an extended period in real life, but it seemed that all my worries were in vain as became obvious in less than twenty minutes in the car as we drove to Denny's for a meal.

The waitress, Melinda, was awesome and we told her why we were all there and everything about Dir en grey. She wrote them down and promised to look them up. She was nice and we were happy to have someone so awesome as a waitress. Back to the hotel we went and the remainder of the night was spent... in a very interesting fashion.

Seven the following morning, I wake up and wait on Tabby to come to do my hair. She's in beauty school and I had shown her pictures of Kyo's haircut and asked if I could have it like that. She showed up with her two friends and we went about doing my hair after squeeing and hugging. It's the one time a year I get to see her and I miss her so much in between. I've been blessed with some very nice friends from online and it's always a pleasure getting to see them each year. Honestly, I can only hope my decisions continue to be this good in the future. For all the rotten apples I've picked in the past, I've been picking the cream of the crop the past few years. Makes it all worth it to know you have people that care so much scattered across the globe.

Eventually, we get my hair done and we all head toward the venue. By that point we're all bubby and excited to be going where we are. We arrived later than we usually do, since it was almost 11 by then. But we didn't mind it, as two of us had learned to accept being further back in the line was not necessarily a bad thing in Houston. (Ahh, the lessons learned this tour....) So we set up residence on our stretch of sidewalk and then wait on the rest of the group to arrive. They do some time later and things get even better. With so many people in one place that all think the same, it was impossible to not be giggling and feeling like we were already concert high.

At one point, we saw Waru and said our hellos to her, hugs were exchanged and that moment was done. Things went back to normal and then later we went to try to give the boys the gift the Dir en grey New Mexico Street Team had chosen to get for the boys and staff. Also, I had a hide plushie for Die I wanted to give him. We went to try to give it to them and found the Colorado Street Team was there already, so we backed off and let them be for then, deciding to do ours later. A few kind of messed up things happened that pissed me off, but whatever. In comparison, that was nothing to what was going to happen later and it doesn't even register as a blip on the radar anymore, just tells me a few things about someone is all.

A Heineken truck appeared for a delivery and we were all taking pictures of it, amused that 'Die's delivery' was there. It became the running joke for a bit.

Later, Roadie John recognized us and we talked for a bit. That was cool. We went back to the line and went right back to being bubbly and laughing a lot. The people in front of us started building snowmen from the snow from the parking lot next to us, which was a great source of amusement.

Twice just before it started to get dark, Kyo wandered along the back fence, talking on his cell phone. No one bothered him or anything and it was really quite nice. I was pleased with how it was all going for the boys. I hate it when people get into their personal space and aren't nice about things. Treat others how you want to be treated. It's a statement to live by. Granted, it doesn't always work, but it's worth a shot.

Eventually, we made friends with Devon, the guy in line behind us, and that was really nice. That's all three times we've met some really awesome people in line and it makes me happy to be a part of the fandom again. Some faith restored that I lose a lot from things that happen.

Saw Die and Nora at starbucks. Also saw Josh and crew from NM!

So we went back to the line. We kept waiting on the line to get moving and in order. Will call finally opened and that must have been a relief for anyone with tickets they needed to pick up. The line got moved around a lot, but I think we all managed to almost keep our places. Some idiots cut in front of us, but we just kind of ignored it. Whatever... we were getting merch anyway since we missed out in Houston and Dallas. No biggie.

Getting inside was... much easier than years past. No one said anything about anything, including cameras. Kind of sad given I wanted to have had my DSLR by then, but oh well. There was a brief panic over the ages of people being let into the venue, which was quickly put to rest and calmed the lot of people under 21 down. We got inside and I was more than delighted to discover that they actually had three freaking t-shirts in my size! They never do and it always makes me upset. I didn't even get one last year at all because of that, but this year made up for it. So, new clothing stash!

We stood around for not too long, waiting. I was like the fifth or sixth row back, right between Kyo and Die. Pretty much where I wanted to be, though further back than usual. Oh well, out of three shows, it was the only time I wasn't 2nd row, so I can't complain.

The opening band was Solar Bear. Overall, they were a lot better live than they are on their myspace page. I'd been real worried about them getting booed once they were on the listing for that show. But no one in my area booed and while they couldn't get us to move, they still accomplished a lot by not getting booed a lot. At one point, the vocalist actually pleaded with us, saying, "We've got a bet going with those guys, he said he'd eat our face if we couldn't get you guys moving for them, so for our sake, please!" which actually highly amused me. I did feel bad for him, but my feet were killing me and honestly, I'm never one to actually start something like that. I'll go with the crowd, but unless it's Dir en grey, I'm not all that mosh-pit oriented. The vocalist pouted at us, begged a little more, and then at the end, the bassist threw down his bass and the drummer tossed his drums around, but he seemed to be just drunk and like 'ahh, I have to schlep it anyway, who cares!' There was actually a smattering of applause at the end, and it made me feel a little better because I always feel terrible for the opening bands.

8:57pm

Sa Bir comes on and I wait for the surge that I remembered from Inward Scream. No such thing happens and I feel myself wondering what the hell, because the crowd in Denver is always rather push/shove. It takes them until the boys are actually on stage and Sa Bir is ending before the crowd is screaming and pushing. But at least the surge happened. It wasn't Dallas, but it was a shitload more than Houston.

Kyo's mic was higher than he wanted it to be and they had a brief pause to fix it, some background music playing. Die left the stage, giving John his guitar and then disappearing outside. The next song started and he still wasn't back. John started to look frantic and try as I might, I couldn't look away from that door, waiting on him to come back, worrying. He was actually late for his part of the song, coming in almost a minute and a half into the song and taking his guitar back, which John damn near shoved at him.

All I can fathom was that he was sick, which is highly possible. I stopped worrying and started moving.

I just put my camera away, unable to focus on the fact that it even existed anyway.I alternated between head banging and surging with the crowd again and again.

Die was singing with us again, something I always enjoy watching him do, singing back to him and Kyo at the top of my lungs. It's exhilarating. He actually had to back up from his mic at one point because those of us near him could actually hear him singing. He looked a little startled, but then kept right on singing.

I had both my hands in the air most of the time, singing the choruses loud and clear, my fist pumping and then my hands moving. Kyo crossed himself once.

During Bugaboo, Kyo removed his shirt, doing it very, very slowly and intentionally, basically giving us a striptease out of it. It lead into Toguro, which I have now labeled as Kyo's hips song. The movements change from concert to concert, but they're always just as sexy, just as drawing. No matter how much I try to look at Die during Toguro, I always end up looking right back at Kyo again.

Die made eye contact with me at one point (you know how you know the difference between in your general direction and directly at you? Yeah, that.) and I held it. He smiled that little almost sexual smirk of his and then struck his 'my guitar is my cock' pose and still staring at me, head tilted differently than usual when he does that, he moved his hand up and then down the neck of his guitar a few times, achingly slowly.

Kyo was, as always very much 'on' during the show, though there was an obvious fluctuation in how he felt throughout. At one point, Toshiya went to Shinya's drums and put his foot up on it. After a few moments, he pushed up off it and jumped pretty high in the air, then landed and started doing his crazy hopping around on one foot, RAWR bass thing he does. It's kind of like a ballet dancer on speed. I was reminded, again, that we seriously need to get that man a standup bass at some point.

Kaoru was wearing this really long cardigan and his black tank top. There was a brief moment of amusement over the fact that that was definitely a woman's cardigan.

During Dozing Green, I felt like I was going to pass out. I was shaking like a leaf and actually took my inhaler out to take it. The crowd surged and shoved me further from Kyo and closer to Die. Reiketsu Nariseba came on as the last song of the set and I remember scaring the young girl next to me because I threw myself into it with nothing short of a vengeance.

Die threw his pick right at me. It hit my palm, but bounced out and he kind of gave me this 'damn it' look before walking off stage. We yelled 'Dir en grey' a few times before the Encore, but it was nothing like what we were doing in Dallas to get them back on stage.

When they came back on, Die came back out with a nice icy cold Heineken and looked damn thrilled to be there. They started into The Final and it's honestly the one time I have felt literally traumatized by it. Every lyric, every note slammed into me with a ferocity that it hadn't ever before. I screamed the lyrics, crying all the while. Kigan played and again, I could sing it but forgot what song it was. I fail. Gaika came on and I gave it everything I had left, but by then, it wasn't much. There were no more reserves, no more hidden pits of strength.

Sa Bir
Shokubeni
Red Soil
Agitated Screams of Maggots
[soundeffects]
(Kyo screaming "DENVER!!")
Merciless Cult
Stuck Man
Obscure
[acapella]
Hydra 666
Bugaboo (shirt comes off)
Toguro
Glass Skin
[acapella]
Inconvenient Ideal
Vinushka
Dozing Green
Reiketsu Nariseba [Encore]
The Final
Kigan
Gaika, Chinmoku Ga Nemuru Koro

Afterward, Die threw water like usual and hit me with a few drops from the bottle. Not much and not like Dallas, but a little anyway. Another of his picks missed me by inches and then I stared up at him and he looked right at me and hit me directly with the cap to his water bottle. That I did catch.

I searched the floor for picks really fast. Nothing. And then went to find Elya for the signing. The line got moved from how we were originally doing it and we were all subjected to the grumpy security guy who could have just been nice and was instead yelling at us from the get-go. Eventually, Die and Kaoru came out for the signing and I feel like I've been given a gift again. Because I just wanted to say something... one more thing... to Die before I don't see him for a year. When I got to Die I held out my DVD and then asked, "Die?" and he looked up at me, a spark of recognition in his eyes and then smiles at me. I tell him, "thank you so very much," and he signed the DVD, nodded and made a soft sound at me. He seemed very, very tired, so I think he probably was sick earlier. Kaoru was next and I said his name and he looked up at me, smiled, and then I told him thank you as well. He nodded, smiled, said, "You're welcome," very clearly and then signed my DVD very carefully. I have a lot of sloppy Kaoru signatures, but this one is crystal clear.

I stopped next to Nora and shook her hand, telling her thank you. She smiled, told me thank you for coming to so many shows and for supporting them. She also told me she hoped to see us next time and I told her always. We said bye and then headed off toward the exit. I saw a red pick on the ground on the first riser and went off after it. It was Karou's.

We stopped at Solar Bear's table and told them how they should feel good about the fact that no one booed them because that's a huge accomplishment over every other opening band for Dir en grey. They got real happy over that and then gave us free posters, signing them and smiling a lot.

Outside I saw something that looked like an oddly shaped gum stain. It turned out to be one of Kaoru's picks, a black one. I ended up giving that one to Ashley at Denny's later, just like I'd given Elya Toshiya's pick from Dallas.

We said our goodbyes to Tabby and told her to be safe, then went to our car.

Interesting stuff happened at Denny's afterward, but that's not a concert review, lol. So... yeah... Photos Here!